This was supposed to be my first ever blog post. But somehow I managed to delete it, and now I am reposting it, but it's no longer going to be in the right date order, and I have no idea how to remedy it. I have not idea how to return it to it's rightful place in my blog hierarchy. Boo me! Welcome to my world people, the world of marginally competent but predominantly techno challenged. Good at bluffing my way around squarespace, but only just.
So here is my maiden blog post, in a not so maiden position...
-Leala x
Welcome to my maiden blog post, on this, my brand spanking new website. Oh happy days, oh joyous life.
Please know, this is quite a stretch for me. I tried blogging, once or twice. It was ok, and I enjoyed it, then it petered out. I was not the next big thing, I was not a rising it girl, I was not doyenne of the cyber fabulous. Turns out, I lack a certain drive to tell people my thoughts, and talking to the void of the internet was far less appealing than binge watching Game of Thrones, and, you know, general life and living.
But here I am, back again. This time it is in the context of me and my artistic practice - or lack thereof.
I have returned to study, after a long absence, having taken up pursuing a Graduate Diploma in Applied Arts (Photography) from Whitireia Polytechnic. I have been absent academically, but also artistically, I've spent the last 5 years figuring out how to be a mother and be competent in my home realm and family life. It was quite a shock to the system, but an enjoyable one. Before the birth of my son (who is now 5), I was finishing up my Bachelor of Arts (Pacific Studies) from Victoria University. By finishing up, I really mean finishing up, I was sitting exams at 38 weeks pregnant. Ha! Life's been full and fun and awesome and I sure have learned a damn lot already, though there wasn't a lot of time for my creative practice.
I have always been creative and artistic in one way or another, and it gives me great joy and pleasure, though I haven't always honoured or realised how important a part of me it actually is. This year is a chance for me to reconnect with my creative practice, and really consider if and how it might work for me in the future - I want it to be my life and career, though even saying that is super intimidating!
Photography is a major part of my personal practice, and has been part of my life since I was a child. I have vivid memories of utilising the family point and shoot for my own personal projects. My grandfather was a keen photographer, and I often remember him with his Contaflex, snapping and preserving family history, teaching me how to photograph the toadstools our in the front garden.When I was around 12 or 13, my dad gave me my first Canon SLR film camera, and I was hooked.
In high school I joined the photography club, and spent many, many hours and lunchtimes in the comforting still of the darkroom. I still love being in the darkroom, the thickness of black, so black and dark, you'd never experience it on the outside, life has too much light, even at night. That enveloping soothing dark was broken by the warm red glow of the safety light. To me this was a lesson on the enormous power of our eyes, once you let them adjust, you realised how well they could see with so little. There would always be the constant trickle of water, and (hopefully) the hum of the extractor fan. It was like being in some sort of cave of myth, or what I might imagine a womb was like. Prints would be hanging up drying, and make for an interesting nosy. People would come and go, and you'd exist in a camaraderie of creating, or alternatively, you'd be alone. Occasionally people made out, alas though, not me. Not matter it's state though, I loved it. It was a room brimming with potential energy, fabulous works were waiting to be brought forth.
It was endlessly exciting to me to be alchemist in the balance of art and science that is photography. The technicality of developing and darkroom practice was fascinating, the mix of chemicals, the pursuit of 20 degree water, the precision of time and timing, the art of manipulating and capturing light. Photography, after all, was a scientific experiment before it was an art practice. Some of this scientific wonder has been lost in the demise of analogue printing and processing. Maybe lost is the wrong word, maybe it has been more re-distributed, and now it's less about chemicals and processes and more about sensors and pixels.
I am endlessly grateful I got to learn the craft in the darkroom, and using film. Learning to meter light with your hand, operate your camera manually and understanding the fundamental principles of photography is so freeing, you have the flexibility to apply these skills in so many ways. Shooting with film really taught me about the decisive moment, and how to pursue it when you may only have 24 shots. Shooting without the ability to review was a great learning curve too. Cameras these days are amazing, and I love them, but I still return to these lessons I learnt all those years ago, whether I'm shooting digital or film. I am grateful that these traditions still live on at my school, The Photoschool, and all these years later I can return to the darkroom, develop my films, maybe try a pinhole,or experiment with historical practices like cyanotypes and birchromate printing. There is no limit to the possibilities, in a digital world, the hand processed and printed still appeals to me. I move freely between the digital and the analogue, considering how each can benefit whatever vision or project I am attempting to bring to life.
And so here I am, returning to my photographic work after such an absence.Wish me luck! I have fittingly put my Instagram feed up at the head of my blog, as seriously, that was about the extent of my photography over the last 5 years. And that's OK. I love Instagram and all those iPhone apps, they helped me keep my connection to my photography alive, when it might have dried up forever. Some of it's well over-cooked, or embarrassing, but I leave it all up there as a record of how I was at the time. And they're fun! And they're part of the new wave of innovations in photography's relatively short, yet massively prolific history. We are living in a world saturated with images, it's never been easier to capture an image, share it, print it, or keep it as digital ephemera. And it is within this context that I have to figure out how to make images of meaning and value (to me). Yay! I'll look back and look forward and think about it all, and hopefully come out the other end with something worthwhile.
- Leala